Take it Home
A cozy, candid podcast hosted by two NYC roommates with big dreams, figuring life out one honest conversation at a time. We dive into the beautiful mess of being a 20-something woman navigating life, love, career, and everything in between. Whether it's a chat about moving to a new city, dating disasters, or taking a solo trip across the world, we're here to laugh, cry, and grow right alongside you. Each episode is an invitation to a cozy night in our apartment- complete with real talk, a signature drink of the week, and a "take home" moment to leave you feeling lifted, inspired, and a little less alone. You've just found your new best friends!
Take it Home
Summer Fridays: "Don't Overwork Yourselves!"
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Summer Fridays aren't just for the office.
This week we're talking about how to make the most of your time outside of work, and why summer is the perfect season to start. When the days feel longer and the energy feels lighter, it's important to ask yourself the question: Are you working to live or living to work?
We explore intentional ways to reclaim the bookends of your work day with boundary setting, making space for hobbies, rest, and spontaneity. The goal is to bring the spirit of "Summer Fridays" into everyday life.
Sip of the Week: Pocono Maple Water
https://www.poconomaplewater.com
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Noelle:
Hey, I'm Noelle. And I'm Marissa, but Noelle calls me Pete. Thank you.
SPEAKER_01And welcome back to Take It Home. Woo-hoo. Another week with us and you. Yes, together. Together. Um, first things first, we have a very exciting sippy of the week this week. We do. Let's get right into it. Sippy of the week. Oh, I forgot about our song. Can't forget about that. Sippy of the weekie. Sippy of the weakie. Okay. So this week we have ducono maple water. Wow, we did a good job saying that at the same time. So this is fresh water straight from maple trees from the Pocono Mountain Farms. Yes. If you guys don't know what the Poconos are, it's a beautiful um mountain area in I almost said Philadelphia. Nope. In Pennsylvania. Close enough. Um, we have never been, but hopefully we'll get to go. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So this water is literally harvested directly from maple trees.
SPEAKER_01We had a phone call with Nicole from Pocono Maple Water, and she was just explaining how thoughtful the process is for the maple water. They really care about everything down to the packaging. She was thinking of all of the different kinds of packaging that she could use that wouldn't affect the flavor, but would also be good for the environment. Um and I just never really thought about the fact that that much has to go into water. Yeah. Or it doesn't have to go, but but it can.
SPEAKER_02And we they did it. We are a big fan of what they stand for. And and yeah, it's exciting. And we both we did hot yoga this morning. So this is a perfect sip of the week to, you know, get our extra hydration in. And I was saying we did film a little like TikTok trying this for the first time. So I'm so sorry, you're not gonna get our raw reaction. But this would be so good because what it tastes like, it has like it tastes mainly like water, but it has like a little little hint of sweetness. It's not overly sweet or anything. Yes, and it's not overpowering. I need to say that. Yeah, but it would be really good to drink. I've been doing like coconut water Americanos. This would be so good. A maple water Americano, uh coconut water matcha, maple water matcha, like over ice. So let's try it on here for you guys. We put it over ice because we they were just kind of room temperature in our in the package that we received. So we put it over ice, but obviously you can store them in the fridge and and be cold. But cheers. Cheers, it's so interesting.
SPEAKER_01It's just nice. I don't know. It's very light and refreshing. I feel like it would be really good with a squeeze of lemon, too. Yeah, you could do so many things with this. I feel like, you know, yeah, definitely. You can taste this. Is gonna sound so cheesy. I'm not just saying this because they sent it to us, but you can really taste the hydration in a way. Like, I don't know if that makes sense, but it just feels like if you can taste the sweetness of it, you just know you're getting all those minerals and whatnot. I'm not a water connoisseur. It honestly has like a thickness to it too, but not in a weird way.
SPEAKER_02Exactly. Like it it just feels high quality.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it does. I feel so luxe right now sitting in bed drinking my makeup.
SPEAKER_02Well, I'm so happy now. We have a bunch in our fridge. Yay, we're gonna be so hydrated. We're gonna be so hydrated. So thank you. Post-hot yoga. Maybe one of these days we'll be able to get y'all some or something. Also, for those of you who may be watching and have watched in the past, you may notice the quality looks a lot better. That's because we got a new camera, you guys. Yay!
SPEAKER_01We just kind of bit the bullet and did it. We have been talking about it for a while because it's very frustrating that our TikTok and Instagram videos are slightly blurry. Funny enough, I was talking to my dad on the phone today, though, and I mentioned it, and he was like, they don't look blurry. I was like, really?
SPEAKER_02Compared to what it could be, I mean, it didn't look horrible. Um, but our whole philosophy, at least the way I was thinking about it when we started this, was you know, it's a podcast. Yeah. I love to have the video to, you know, have content and stuff to post. But like, I really just wanted to focus on the audio quality. And I was like, we I I know we'll we'll get there. Like, we'll get a better camera when the time is right, but like that wasn't the priority to me. And it looks good enough. The time is right, y'all. We really wanna we're wanting to amp up our the quality of our content so more people can find our podcasts. Yes. And that's the whole why behind all of this. So we did it, and I hope it looks better. I really hope so. Fingers crossed. And it's it's so tiny. We used to film on my laptop, so it we're used to seeing a big screen and being able to like see ourselves. And now we have a camera and it's far away, and I can't see what I look like.
SPEAKER_01It's so cute though. I love our little camera. Maybe we'll start vlogging, y'all. Yeah, maybe. Let us know if you think we should vlog.
SPEAKER_02And I'm like nervous. I'm like, I hope it's recording. It definitely is because it's blinking red. Yes, but but it's scary. Getting scared.
SPEAKER_01Smile of the week, smile, smile of the week, smile of the week, smile, smile of the week. For those of you who are new to the pod, smile of the week is a segment we have where we each share something that made us smile the previous week. So let's get into it. Pete, you go first. I know what yours is gonna be.
SPEAKER_02I know what mine is. My smile is literally from today. Um, Noelle and I decided to do like a major deep clean of our apartment. Um, we just really needed it. We did we clean daily here and, you know, here and there, like cleaning up after ourselves, obviously. But there's just over time, if you don't get deep into the cracks and crevices, um, things just build up and it was dusty and dirty and cluttered. And we really got in there. Noelle kind of focused on the bathroom, I focused on the kitchen. We like swiffered our floors and mopped and I was literally sitting on the bathroom floor for a long time. Um, but anyway, like cleaning. This is why I've become a cleaner person in general over the years, because this feeling is unmatched.
SPEAKER_01Like it does feel very, very, very nice.
SPEAKER_02It makes me feel happy and light and like the apartment is clean. I feel like I can breathe. It it really affects how I feel on the inside.
SPEAKER_01And that makes sense. It's a it's a cycle. Yeah, it's like being clean makes you feel good, and when you feel good, you have more energy to be clean.
SPEAKER_02And like hopefully we're at we're at like a good clean point now to where we can maybe just work a little harder on the upkeep and not have to do this or like let it get to that point. Um, but anyway, that's my smile. I feel so happy. It's Sunday, so it's like a perfect day um to clean and get ready to go into a new week. Just feeling I can worry and place my attention on other things because my space is clean, you know what I mean? Um, and also, just more specifically, Noelle and I have white countertops, and over the years they have just gotten so stained with mostly I feel like espresso really stains it, or like if you get like berries on there, anything dark stains the shit out of it, and we just have not been able to get the stains out, and it looks it always looks like our countertops are dirty, but they're not, they're just stained.
SPEAKER_01Literal, like any spray cleaner, not any most spray cleaner does not work. And this was meant to be because we ran out of cleaning spray.
SPEAKER_02That's so true. It was meant to be. This wouldn't have happened because we ran out of cleaning spray mid-clean, and I was like, Oh, I guess I'll have to run to the store because like we are ha only halfway done. We need more spray. And earlier we were talking about how to get stains out of the countertop, and you were like, I think maybe bleach. And I was like, Okay. So then I went to the store to get more cleaning spray, and I found this Lysol all-purpose cleaner that has bleach in it, and I was like, Let me just get this. It says it whitens surfaces. It worked so well. It worked, it got counters are white now, yeah. And I'm like, And they haven't been in four years, yeah. And they it just makes it look cleaner, even though it's just the fact that it's whitening it, it's not like necessarily making it cleaner, it's just whitening it. But it, I mean, getting rid of stains, yeah, it's gonna make it look better. So thank God, it looks so much better. It's like shiny and oh my god, I'm just so happy. And like we're cleaning the windows are open and it's spring and it's like fresh air, and I just want to cry. I'm so happy.
SPEAKER_01Anyway, what's your smile? Well, that is um something I'm also smiling about, but not the smile I will share. I my smile is that the other night I had a game night with a few of my friends. Pete was there. That's a good one. It was just me, Pete, Blaine, Jalen, and Michaela who have all been on the podcast.
SPEAKER_02That's so true.
SPEAKER_01I was gonna say, you guys don't know them, but you do. And if you don't, go back and listen. You can know them. Yes, you can very well, especially Michaela, because she's been on two episodes and she got married in uh like a few months ago, and I feel like we were just talking about her wedding for a while. That's true. But I like to have I love playing card games. Fun facts about me. I love games, I think they're fun. I like games that I really have to use my brain in. Um, and we played phase 10. If you know, you know. It's so fun. And it was just really nice to see a couple of friends I hadn't really seen in a while, and we were just laughing and catching up. And I also just haven't gone out drinking in a while, and I got four drinks, and I got my dinner and my snacks there, and I was just like bawling out for no reason, not really, but like more than I normally would because I'm really trying to save money nowadays. But I was like, you know what? It's Friday. I've been exhausted recently, working so much, so I'm gonna go have a night with my friends and get dinner and drinks and laugh and be merry and play games, and it was just so fun.
SPEAKER_02It was really fun, and then we were home by midnight, yeah. And it was fun to be in a different part of the city too. We went to the seaport district, which is the is at the very bottom of Manhattan. Um, and like near Feedai, kind of is Feideye, I don't know, that area. And we never go over there because we don't ever have a reason to, but it was just fun to be in like a different area that we aren't normally in. I mean, you are there now all the time.
SPEAKER_01I usually am there all the time now.
SPEAKER_02Now you work over there, but um but I don't really hang out over there. Yeah, I guess it's different when you're like going to a pub, and the pub was popping. It was popping. There were a lot of people there. It was really, really fun. And I am not the biggest game person. I I guess I'm just like picky about games. Like that's fair. But I had a lot of fun. I like phase 10. I want to play chameleon at next game night. Chameleon is a game that I love, it's so fun. Yes. If you don't, if you know, you know. Chameleon is really fun. Um, anyway, yeah, a good smile.
SPEAKER_01Should we get into our top top ick ick? Yes, yes, yes, yes. Pete, this was your topic idea.
SPEAKER_02It was. And what is it? Well, something that's been on my mind recently, since it's turning into summer and it's spring. Um, and then just in general, I feel like I have been trying to figure out where I can find more ease in my life and where I can optimize my time outside of work. Because we are busy bees uh more so than ever, for some reason. I think it because we both work multiple jobs. We have the podcast, like our own endeavors. You're doing a night of new works, I'm getting ready to release an EP. Then we also need to, you know, plan time to have social things with friends, and life just feels crazy. I was recording an audiobook for a few months and I just finished it. So, like that was taking up with a lot of my time. And now that I have a little more breathing room, I and especially because it's warm out. Whenever the weather starts to warm up, I start feeling like, okay, how can I optimize my my me time out of outside of work or like my obligations? So I was like thinking about the concept of summer Fridays, which if you don't know what that is, it's like I guess some companies will let you leave early on Fridays or work from home on Fridays or no work on Fridays. In the summer. I in the summer. I've never experienced that personally, but same. I was thinking about the concept of it and how we could take that concept and kind of incorporate it into our daily lives, not just in the summer and not just on Fridays. Um true. But the summer is a great time to start practicing this because one, it's so much easier to get outside. It is so nice. Like you go outside and it feels like you want to slow down your walk. I mean, until it gets like to being hell's front porch. But right now we're in the sweet spot where it feels like an exhale to me. Like it really does. That sounds so like woo-woo, but every time spring rolls around and I can stop tensing my body from being so cold. No, literally. It just feels like an exhale. I slow down my walking, literally, like not just rushing to get from point A to point B, but like actually maybe enjoying the stroll, you know? So it's a great time to do that. The days feel longer. We have more daylight. Yes. So it's easier to like start making your mornings or your evenings, the bookends of your work day more intentional. So that's what I wanted to talk about today. Maybe just some ways that I do that, that Noelle does that, and why it's important.
SPEAKER_01Well, I I feel like this sode came at a good time because, as you guys know, I talked a little bit in last week's sode about how I've been burnt out. Did I? Yeah. I think so. And it was last week. I have just realized literally within the past week that I need to make more time for myself. I am someone who is always giving mental health advice, saying, make sure you're not overdoing it. You have to have a day off. Make time for yourself. And realized about a week ago I have not been doing any of those things. And I kind of had a mental breakdown last week because I realized I've low-key been working seven days a week for a while, or maybe I'll have like one day off here and there. And I'm not working eight hours all of those days. There are some days when I will go and just like have to do a food tour, and that's just three hours of my time in one day. Or last Saturday I picked up a babysitting job that was 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. So it was later in the day, but that's still not a full day off for me. I still wake up in the morning and think, okay, this is what I have to do later. And your whole day kind of centers around that thing. Exactly. And I just remember I picked up that babysitting job because I wasn't really thinking ahead, or I guess in a way I was because I am really trying to make more money this year. But I was like, you know what? I have Saturday free. And this babysitting job just came into my inbox. So I will accept it. Without thinking about the fact that the next day I had to work at eight in the morning, and then I had to go and do. Did I have a food tour after that? No, I went and helped a friend with a self-tape. And then after that, I had to film the podcast and just had a full day on Sunday. And Saturday was gonna be my only day off for that entire week. And that also happened to be the day where my mental health felt the worst during my mental my mental breakdown. And I was just like, why the literal freak did I give myself work on my one day off?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I think it's sorry, go ahead. No, that's really it. And I've just been kind of reevaluating my life. I literally was like, I feel like I need to go to Greensboro for months. There's maybe a world in which if I can't seem to get my life back in order here soon, which I already feel like I am a little bit because I'm letting go of one of my jobs soon, and just you know, finding ways to make life more sustainable for me. But just little things people have been saying, like Rodney recently was like, Rodney is my boyfriend. For those of you who don't know, he I just mentioned, like, oh, I have to go to the yoga studio tomorrow. And I'm so stressed because I have so much to do. I have another job at a yoga studio that I don't get paid for, but I get a free membership. So it is worth it when I'm reaping the benefits. I have only been going during my shift. And then it's like, and then it's like, why? What's the point? Exactly. And Rodney was just kind of like, it's you're really stressed and doing way too much, and now you're just doing this job that isn't paying you, and you're not using the membership. And I was like, that's fair, but I really want to, so I'm trying to let go of other things because I would really like hot yoga to be a part of my schedule. I love it, I miss it. I don't want to quit that. I think I just need to um let go of other things that aren't serving me. So, point is I have been doing way too much and not giving myself enough time to be a person. And I've been feeling very depressed because of because of it until the past week. I mean, burnout isn't just something that gets cured overnight. I'm still going to have to work on it and still don't feel like, yay, my life is perfect yet. But I have been taking care of myself. My mom forced me to take a day off of work. She was literally like, you are not allowed to work on was it Memorial Day? On Memorial Day. You need to rest. That is a holiday. You've been working seven days a week. So I've been trying to have more fun in the past few days. Have been treating myself a little more, nothing too crazy, and re-evaluating my life in different ways. Yeah. That's good. That's needed, I think. Yeah. Um, so that's more of my contribution to summer Fridays right now, and why I feel like I need this episode rather than just to like have fun this summer, but more like you need to. What's the point of life if you're not adding in little things here and there to enjoy the ride?
SPEAKER_02It's like fun and rest and rejuvenation. It's just a perfect time for it because the days feel longer, even though they're technically not, but the sun is out for longer. So it maybe you have more energy to do some of the things that in winter would just feel like, nope, I need to go home and lay on the couch, you know? The sun really helps too. It really, really does. It just feels nice. I'll just say, like a general thing that I try to do for myself is to set boundaries around for myself, around I guess like work.
SPEAKER_01And how do you do that? What is your setting boundary method? Because you're way better at setting boundaries than I am. I'm just like, yeah, I'll do that to anything anyone asks me, and then I'm dying.
SPEAKER_02Well, I think it's different. I mean, our situations are different. Like, I I may have a little more consistency than you do, just the way that our jobs are. Like that is I typically know when I'm working and when I'm not. Um it is very hard working multiple jobs, which you're working two jobs right now, too. Yeah, yeah, I am, but my schedule stays pretty consistent week to week. Yeah. So I do know, I guess I'm lucky in that way, where like, but I I guess like all you need is to know at the beginning of the week what's happening so that you can plan around that. It's okay if it looks different week to week, but as long as you kind of know what's happening in the week and what you need to get done, then you can set boundaries and be like, okay, so so generally, you know, you can't always control like when you may need to go to work, but outside of work, I try to set boundaries with myself. Like, okay, depending on how I'm feeling or whatever, like for the most part, once I come home, I kind of don't like to do anything else. Yeah. That ha requires my energy. Obviously, leave your work at work. That's like an a given. Um, but I don't really like to do chores when I come home. I kind of leave my evenings to be like. Like my sacred time to like rest and get ready for the next day. That being said, because I have to do that, I really have to get shit done during the day and optimize my mornings. For sure. And that leads me to say, and hey, I'm gonna say this all of this may not work for everyone, but this is just what helps me. I've been getting up earlier to do things that I used to do after work. It's making my life feel a lot easier, even though getting up and doing stuff is so hard. But I feel like if you can stay consistent with it for a couple weeks, you'll see how it actually allows you to kind of ease up. Yeah. Because you're getting things done, like as long as you can get enough sleep, you can, you know, have a restful evening and get to bed at a reasonable hour. You're getting things done in a time frame in the morning when you would just be sleeping anyway.
SPEAKER_01Like, what are the some of the things that you'll do in the morning that you are things you need to get done?
SPEAKER_02Well, for me, my workout yoga, that is something I need to get done at least three to four times a week. That's like just where I am right now as a non-negotiable, it makes me feel a lot better. So, like, I used to go in the evenings a lot after work, but it kind of felt really hard to do that. Yeah. Even though I loved, I loved it, like I love an evening yoga moment, but after a long day of work, it's like, ugh, then I cancel it because I don't want to go, you know? Exactly. So I guess like my what I need to get done and may be different from the next person, but some like self-care things are non-negotiables for me. Yoga is one of them. My meditation and journaling, my little like morning routine, I make sure that I have enough time to do that as well. That's what really centers me. And this may sound really similar to the things I've talked about in our self-care episode, but that was so long ago now. If it's a day that I don't work in the morning, that's when I would get done like my other side jobs, like when I was recording the audiobook. Yeah. When I needed to do things for my music that weren't necessarily creative, but more like a checklist. Like I need to resing this line. I need to. So for you, it could be like doing your night of new work stuff. I have that in my schedule on Tuesday. And I think that's the key. You know, and maybe it works better for you to do that in the evening. Like everyone's different, but for me, um, I just know after a long day of work and I feel drained, it's important to leave some time at the end of the day to kind of just like relax. When I can't do that, what I really love to do is set a timer or something and be like, okay, I'm gonna go home and then set a timer for like an hour and say, I'm gonna spend an hour doing this. So you put boundaries around it. You light a candle. So I like to be intentional about the space I'm in, like cleaning up, just trying to like get rid of stress in places and then also add in intentional like coziness. If it's something that's a little more tedious or something you don't want to do, and you have to do it after a long workday, like okay, set a time, a time limit, 30 minutes, one hour, so that you're not getting carried away. And you know that after that hour, like, okay, that's when I'm gonna go eat my dinner and watch my show. And then also just having like grace with yourself too. If you're a little more tired than expected one day. Um, and I'm like, let's say I was planning to record a chapter of the audiobook, and I just like cannot, okay, I'm not gonna do it today, but I need to find another time that I am making sure I get it done in that time, you know? So I guess that's what I mean by boundaries with myself and my time, knowing what works for you, I think is the most important thing.
SPEAKER_01Um and do you leave room in your schedule to be social? Like, how do you okay? Because I feel like for me, if my schedule is just open, I have a habit, as you all know, of just putting things in wherever there's an open slot where maybe I should be using that for self-care. How do you know in advance if someone asks you to hang out, whether or not you should say yes? I that's a good question. Or do you not have the answer?
SPEAKER_02I tend to, I'm I also have pretty strict boundaries around that for myself too, because I don't view all free time as open time. Uh-huh. I I guess I know how my weeks and my days usually make me feel. Like I know Mondays are a long day, my Thursdays are a long day. Tuesdays, I get off a little early from nannying. So like maybe I could do some, like I kind of just have an idea of how I feel week. Like I take that into account, and then I try to keep my social time kind of around the weekends when I can. Weekdays are kind of just like my my time to do shit that I need to do, you know? I mean, that makes sense. And then like Friday, Saturday, Sunday, I will be way less like strict with myself, and that's when I will be more intentional about trying to make plans with people. But obviously, like that's it varies week to week. So if someone asks me to hang out and they can't do the weekend, I get off a little early on Tuesdays, like, let's do this, but I'm not gonna drink, you know, like let's do something, and then I'm gonna be home by 10. Like, you know, so that's how I approach that. But aside from having the boundaries, I think you have to have those first, and then you can kind of choose where you want to optimize your time and enjoy it a little more. Something that I like to do if like I have a long work day is try to have just like one thing to look forward to every night. Um sewed. Sewed and chill. Sewed and chill, but maybe something like a little more intentional, but it can be so small. Like I'm gonna stop by the grocery store on the way home and I'm gonna grab my favorite ice cream or like my favorite fun drink. Or you don't have to spend money. It can be, I know something I did once was I took like a different route home and got off a like stops earlier than I needed to, and I walked through Central Park to like get to the train just to take a walk because it was a beautiful day and it was still light out, and I had the time, you know. Yeah, just doing like little things, especially in the summer, your life doesn't just have to be get up, go to work, go home. Like, I feel like it's so important to do things after work, for sure, but it's so hard to if you're burnt out and tired, which is why you need the boundaries.
SPEAKER_01You see what I'm saying? So you can't really okay, so what you are saying is you can't really have summer Fridays unless you have boundaries.
SPEAKER_02Yes, in a weird roundabout backwards way, because like I just said, you need to do things outside of work in the morning, at night. Otherwise, what is life? You're just going to work and doing nothing else. But it's really hard to have the energy to do anything after work or before get up earlier to do things before work if you don't have boundaries or structure. So therefore, you need to make the boundaries for yourself so you have the energy to be intentional about your time outside of work. For sure.
SPEAKER_01No, that's true. I think about people who I mean, I've been working way too much recently. It's hard with part-time jobs and the artist struggle too. It's not like I'm working the same thing and doing the same thing all day, every day, which also could become very monotonous. Is that how you say it? Monotonous. Monotonous. You're right the first time. Could become very monotonous and maybe boring and like, oh, oh my gosh. And I feel like for so long I enjoyed having multiple things because I don't get bored, but now I'm just burnt out because I'm like running from place to place, trying to trying to organize so many things. And not only do I work multiple jobs, but they're all at different times every day. Like I never know, I can't plan tour dieting super ahead of time, really. My other part-time assistant job, I'm now I'm just trying to fill in where I can. And yeah, it's just like, oh my gosh, my schedule's so inconsistent. I feel like I'm always figuring out what I want to do or how to do it.
SPEAKER_02I guess it's it's hard, I guess, if you have a a schedule that inconsistent. Because even though I don't have like, well, I actually just transitioned to a full-time job. Yay! I am going to be done nannying in like in a week. Yeah, a week from Tuesday will be my last day, which is crazy. It is very sad. It feels like a natural chapter coming to a close, a natural end. Um, but and then naturally I am transitioning to full-time at the jewelry store I work at. So I guess like I will have even more consistency than I did. But even with my nanny job, like it's not like I have this nine to five structure, but it is pretty consistent. Like my schedule at the jewelry store stays pretty consistent. If anything, it switches every once in a while. Yeah. And then my nanny hours are pretty much the same unless I have to stay late one night, or sometimes here and there things are different. But I feel like yours is different because it's literally different every day, every week.
SPEAKER_01It is. Um, but also I think that I can find ways to make my life better. And I'm doing that. I'm leaving one of the jobs, adding more hours with another one, aka next school year I'll just be nannying and doing tour guiding um and leaving my personal assistant job aw. Um, but there are so many people who also work just one job, but I think of like finance people and like all these corporate people who work insane hours, like work until 11 p.m.
SPEAKER_02I think understand that. Can someone explain this to me? Because I've never had a corporate job job. So I like you get paid a salary, so you get paid the same amount every week, but overtime. Do are these people getting overtime pay? Because maybe what if you're working on salary? No, but if you work more than 40 hours a week, they can't like that doesn't make any sense.
SPEAKER_01I think some of it is like just this fucked up culture. At least I know from for example, I have one friend who works way too much. If you're listening to this, you know who you are, love you. And um that she's on salary, so she does not really get paid overtime. Actually, that's not really true. She did get some overtime. But the thing is well, for her, her bosses give her way too much work and make insane deadlines. And for her, it's like, okay, well, why wouldn't you just leave the job and get a new one? In her opinion, the job is really, really cool, which it is cool. And there are some cool perks, like free stuff, I don't know. But um, she, because of these crazy deadlines her boss puts on her, does it are they saying, hey, you need to stay in office until midnight tonight? No. But in order to get all of the things done by the deadlines, she has to do that. And so I wonder if that's how it is with finance too. And if they're just apparently with finance also, you work way more when you first start out, and the higher up you move, the less you have to work.
SPEAKER_02So I'm like like I get I get that, I guess, but I still don't get how that is like legally allowed. I don't know. Because if you're working non-stop, like and not getting paid any extra for it, it just doesn't, I don't get it.
SPEAKER_01Or maybe it's the like working so hard so in the future you'll get extra money because you're working your ass off now to like it shouldn't have to be that way. It should not have point is it shouldn't have to be that way. But I'm just thinking about people like that who like I mean, I'd guess what advice to give like with the deadlines.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, the company's not saying you have to stay till 11 p.m. and do this, but they kind of are in an indirect way because if they're giving you so much work that it's impossible to get it done in like a normal nine to five work week structure, then what the fuck are you supposed to do?
SPEAKER_01So it's kind of just messed up. When I randomly dated the finance frat bro, like the first year I moved to New York, he had two cell phones. One was like his personal one and the other one was for work. And he would have to take work calls when we were hanging out, he would randomly have to be working, he he'd get a text and he'd be like, Oh shit, I need to do this. And he'd have to start working on a project real quick. I just feel like there's it's very hard to have boundaries with that too, because you're just kind of on call 24-7. And maybe the money is worth it for them. I mean, finance people are known for being wealthy, so it's like maybe because you're working all the fucking time, but you're making so much money that you're able to improve your quality of life with the finances you're making. Maybe that's worth it for some people, and then maybe you get really slay vacations. I don't know. I don't really get it.
SPEAKER_02It's hard for me to speak on that, yeah, because I don't have that around my work. I also I'm intrigued. Yeah, I don't know. Like I I can under I understand where the people are coming from, I guess. I just don't I would not know how to have boundaries around that kind of thing.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02You know what I mean? Exactly. Because I just don't have that experience. Um and if a certain like your company has certain expectations on you, it better be worth it with what you're getting paid.
SPEAKER_01I guess any advice I could give to you guys, first of all, like maybe don't take my advice because I know nothing about your lives or how that works, but I guess just evaluate is it worth it or is it not worth it?
SPEAKER_02And think about where you really need to be working more, or like where you really could be drawing a boundary where you're not, but like maybe you really could if you tried. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01Oh my gosh, just American culture, this grind, grind, grind, work your ass off so you can become rich. Oh, it's just so I guess exhausting to live in.
SPEAKER_02That's what I've been feeling a lot lately, and that's what's inspired me to kind of come up with this topic because I've just been looking at my own life and thinking, where can I live my life? You know, because literally I have not been living my life. Every time I think about it gets me so existential because I'm like, oh, we just wake up every day and we go to work and we spend eight hours there, whatever it is, and then we come home and then we do it again the next day for five days in a row, and then you get like a few days off. I don't know. It's just like what are we all doing? Like, why did we structure society like this? I don't know why we did this to ourselves. Maybe I sound stupid, but like you don't sound stupid. I I actually texted you the other day because I worked a day where I I just worked from like 10 to 4. And it felt so nice because it felt like the perfect time slot of work. And I was like, I wish we could, I wish the like typical work week was 10 to 4. Four days a week. Yeah. Like, wouldn't that be so nice? Like 10 is a great time to start working. Four, it's still the afternoon. You can still do something before you need to like eat dinner. You know, I just it was like a perfect day. It still felt like a significant amount of work, but not too much. You can still have a morning, you can still have an evening. I'm like, why don't we have that? Like, I know that there are some other countries who have such better work-life balance. Yes. I just think about the fact that so many people just go to work and go home and literally what's the point of life? I mean, like you're making money and then you don't even have like what are you for what? To do what? You know?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. So it's save for retirement. It's scary, but then what if you don't make it to retirement? Not to be morbid, but like I mean, I I I get it. I think it's responsible, obviously, to save money and be good with money. I think I could learn a lesson or two about being better at saving money. However, you you can't just wait until then to do anything fun. I'm not saying that any listeners are not doing an like anything fun at all until they turn 65. But you know, like use your PTO. You please, for the love of God, use your PTO. If you have PTO, use it. You're getting paid to not work, and you um like what is the point? Do not do not skip that. Even if you use your PTO to just like go to the park one day all day and nothing special, just please use your PTO. Some people have unlimited PTO, which is crazy.
SPEAKER_02And the psychology behind that is that if you give an employee unlimited PTO, they are less likely to use it than if you give them limited PTO.
SPEAKER_01Isn't that crazy? That is so interesting. Why is that? Because people feel guilty about using it, like a good employee would be scared to abuse it, I guess. Probably that. Being scared of looking like you're abusing it.
SPEAKER_02Maybe also, even though there's no way to abuse it, you literally have it's weird. Unlimited PTO. Like, how can there be no guidelines around that?
SPEAKER_03I don't know.
SPEAKER_02But also, I don't know, if you think about it, like let's say you're given two weeks PTO per for the year. It just feels more like, okay, I have these two weeks, like, where am I gonna use them? As opposed to just having like unlimited PTO. It might just feel like unstructured and like how do you I don't know. I don't know. Um but I'm like, what else? What else do I try to do? I think a really good way book club. Yeah, I mean, having intentional social time is important, like we were talking about before a little bit, and it doesn't have to be like going out or drinking or spending all this money, like it could be something like you start a club. Um book club has been a really cute and wholesome way to do that, like our little game night, just things like that.
SPEAKER_01Oh, this morning when I was walking to yoga, I was listening to a podcast, it was on the an episode of the daily, but this one was let me pull it up so I can tell you guys because I highly recommend listening to it. Want to optimize your happiness? This happiness expert says don't. And it's this woman, Lori Santos, on what will really bring meaning and fulfillment to your life and what won't. And she pretty much was talking about how so many of us are insanely burnt out. She's a professor at Yale and talks about how her students uh worked so hard to get there, and she knows that obviously to get into Yale, you have to work pretty hard. A lot of her students get there and they're like so burnt out from how much they work and they're not having fun and they spend all their time studying. And then some people are giving up because they're like, technology and AI is gonna take our jobs anyways, and like, what's the point? I don't like I don't have anything to work towards, which is really sad, but also talking about how phones and computers are everywhere, and instead of people in a coffee shop chatting, saying hello to one another, everybody's just sitting separately on their phone, and how just pretty much saying how important community is and to get off your phone and to be with people in person. It sounds so basic, but it's so true. It is, and I think that that's a good way to optimize a summer Friday. And she was mentioning, or the person who was interviewing said, like sometimes when you have an extra hour or something to yourself, you'll use it laying in bed looking at your phone. And although that feels like rest, it's actually not restful for you. That's making your brain go crazy. Your eyes are staring at this screen, and that's not actual rest. Like phone time is not restful time. And also, I thought this was interesting. She said that we actually have a lot more time in the day than we used to, but our time has been more scattered around. So, for example, we'll randomly have like, oh, 10 free minutes here, and then in an hour, you'll have another five minutes free. And normally when it's that short of amount, that short of an amount of time, it feels like you only have time to scroll on your phone. So you fill in all of these gaps throughout the day with your phone. So, yep. Which I never thought about it that way, but I was like, whoa, I guess I do. Like when I'm on the subway, I go on my phone. When I'm in a waiting room, I go on my phone, like waiting at nannying for her to get out of school. I'm just scrolling on my phone and it's like, damn, I'm really doing. That instead of saying hi, looking around me. And I think that using even those small, like 10 minutes, five minutes waiting for something to happen, that's still a break. And if you're filling all of those breaks with staring at your phone, that ain't good for you. So I thought that was really interesting and a way to optimize your time, maybe in those breaks is to Yeah.
SPEAKER_02What can you replace looking at your phone with with in those short windows?
SPEAKER_01Well, maybe you could even replace if you still are looking at your phone, maybe you can replace on your phone. Well, maybe that's defeating the whole purpose because we should be communicating with others. But that's why I love brick. You can turn off some of your apps. Brick is a device that you can use to manage your social media use. It's amazing. But for example, if you wanted to use like Duolingo or go on and play Wordle or something that uses your brain, a good first step, too.
SPEAKER_02Like if you are addicted to your phone, that's a really good first step. I know that last summer, when I took a very long social media break that was very necessary for me, I felt like I needed something, not I it's mindless is not the word, but like something to fill in the gaps. Yeah. It's like calming, but also not not so mindless. Um, but I downloaded a couple games that were like puzzle games that were exercising my brain that were like calming to me. Yeah. But it was something that I could do in the passing time. And I think like ideally you'd want to like stray from your phone altogether, but that is a really good place to start. I think that if you're gonna go cold turkey and just be like, okay, no social media for a week or whatever, um, or no social media during my downtime during the day, a really good way to get your brain out of the habit of like opening Instagram, just redirect it to an app that'll kind of challenge your brain. Do a the word, do a crossword, find find a good game, puzzle game. Um, it's a really good transition. Something to stimulate your brain. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I love doing a lingo.
SPEAKER_02Reading, reading is another really good thing. Like reading a book. I try to do that on the train and stuff in the passing moments. I also just sometimes it's nice to do nothing.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Yeah, just sit and look around you. It's a good mindfulness, not trick, I guess, practice. It's a good mindfulness practice to just sit without looking at your phone, without doing anything, and just noticing the things around you, noticing what you see, what you smell, what you hear, what you feel. Being present. Being present. That's very present brain and to help soothe anxiety and stress and just doing that a few times throughout the day. I mean, easier said than done. And it is hard because when we do have free time, but it's in the form of a 10-minute break, it's like, well, what am I gonna do in my 10 minutes? But all those little breaks do add up. That's not really something I had thought about until today, where I'm like, oh, I guess I am looking at my phone a little bit.
SPEAKER_02Literally, why our screen times are so high. It's all those little times, it doesn't feel like how could I have been on my phone for seven hours out of this entire day? All of those in-between moments really add up, which I still can't believe screen times sometimes. Like, what do you mean seven hours? I wasn't even awake scary. How long was I even awake for? It's terrifying. Um, but yeah, I think it's so important to just have a life outside of work and kind of incorporate the concept of summer Fridays into life in general.
SPEAKER_01And the more you pour into yourself, the more you can pour into being social and others and having fun. I've been feeling like anti-social the past few months, which is so not like me at all.
SPEAKER_02The whole thing of like filling your cup, like or your bucket, whatever it's called. Like you can't pour water into someone else's bucket or anyone if you don't have it and you're running on empty. You can't pour maple water into someone else's bucket if your maple water bucket is empty. Exactly. And this reminds me literally during my yoga class today, my instructor was like, Sometimes it can seem really self-indulgent to like be working on yourself so hard. Um, but she was like, but it's not, because I guarantee you, whatever work you do on yourself is going to trickle out, is going to spread um to the others around you. If you are working on yourself and you're having boundaries and you are, you know, getting enough rest and doing the things that you need to do to grow as a person and be the best you, like that's going to affect your the people around you. Whether that's like inspiring them or just being a good energy for that person, you're affecting your immediate community and so on and so forth.
SPEAKER_01So I notice when I spread myself too thin, I end up doing bad at every single thing I'm doing. Right. Because I'm doing too much. Like I become a bad tour guide, I become a bad personal assistant, I become a bad maybe bad is like not the right word. I guess I'm just like less punctual, less on top of things. I'm just so exhausted, my brain is foggy, and then I don't have as much time to be a present friend either. I'm like not good at making plans, responding to people, and it seems, and it's just because I have way too much going on at all times that I'm trying to juggle a million things rather than put effort into a few things.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's a tale as old as time. If you spread yourself too thin and you're doing too many things and you're trying to give your energy to all these different things that you don't have enough for, you're not gonna do any of the things well. So, really, it's better to focus on a few and do those well, you know? Yeah. But then in order to do things well, you also have to take care of yourself. I feel like I'm learning every day.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, me too. I thought this year, I was like, this is the year for me to just grind my ass off, and I'm not gonna go on trips and I'm not gonna, I'm just gonna work so much and get out of credit card debt. And I can do that, but also take time for myself as well because I've been just like working so hard. Taking time for yourself is a part of that.
SPEAKER_02Like, yeah, part of taking care of yourself is finding more softness for your for yourself. It doesn't always mean hanging out with friends, sometimes it means taking a night to yourself.
SPEAKER_01Like, it's all about balance, balance, balance. And you have to have balance to enjoy your summer Fridays. I like keep trying to relate it back to summer Fridays. I mean, it's all this is all related to summer Fridays. Take your summer Friday, guys. Yeah, don't overwork yourselves. What is the take home? The take home is that it's summertime, and in the summer you should have more fun and make time for yourself and those that you love and things that you enjoy. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Pretty much you have to do things intentionally outside of work, otherwise, we are living to work. And we do not want to live to work. What is the point? I don't know. What is the point? We should be working to live. Try to flip the narrative. The reason why we go to work is to we have money to live our lives, not the other way around. Um it can be it can be really hard. Everyone's situation is different. So you just have to like figure out what works for your situation, what makes you feel rejuvenated, what works for your schedule.
SPEAKER_01And also to be clear, I do think being a hard worker is a good quality sometimes. I think it's good to work hard at what you love. This is having boundaries around your hard work. I don't want corporate baddies to listen and be like, but I work hard at my job. The point of this episode is we are saying, yeah, talking about the outside. It's good to work hard. Like that can be a good quality to have, but that shouldn't be the only thing you're doing. Only doing your work all the time doesn't necessarily make you a hard or a better worker. Yeah, that that's a good point.
SPEAKER_02Like, just because you do things outside of work doesn't mean you're not a hard worker. And if the only thing you do is work, that doesn't make you a harder worker than anyone else. Yeah. It's just that we're all working hard, and then you have to have times where you rest and do other things. So then you're able to have the energy to put it. It's also hard work to work on your the balance of your life. It is. It's hard work to get up early and have time for yourself outside of work. It's hard work to make that plan with your friend. Like it's all hard work. Um, so balance, balance. Yeah. So that's that. I guess that's it. I guess that's it. Happy it's not a Friday. I guess when we're filming this or when you're listening to maybe it is when you're listening to this, but it comes out on Thursday. Also, happy Pride Month.
SPEAKER_01Happy Pride Month.
SPEAKER_00Happy Pride Month from the Butter Shop.
SPEAKER_01What is that? Oh my gosh. It's like the funniest TikTok ever. I'll show it to you later. Meg Stalter. Do you know who that is? She's first of all, she's about to be an O'Mary on Broadway. She made this video years ago. It low-key might have been what made her famous. It's just her pretending to be at some like suburban butter shop owner, and she's just like, ha, ha, gay, happy pride month from the butter shop. And it's this whole video of her, like, yes, of her pretending to be a butter shop owner, like celebrating Pride Month. It's so random and it's so funny. Well, well, well, well.
SPEAKER_02You can follow us at Take It Home Pod on Instagram and TikTok, and you can find us wherever you listen to podcasts. If you want to subscribe, that would be great. We come up with a new episode every Thursday. I'm really hungry and I'm gonna eat spaghetti now. I'm gonna eat my famous it's not famous, nectarine salad.
SPEAKER_00Wait, oh my god. That's exciting. That's famous to me. Love y'all. Love y'all. Goodbye.
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